Sunday, October 01, 2006

And the award goes to...

Have you ever seen a bird fly right into a nice clean window and fall to the ground? Do you try really hard not to laugh because you know that sucker is probably dead or hurt pretty badly? I don't. I let that laugh right out, and I can't help but think, "What an idiot."

Have you ever seen a human do that? Probably in the movies right? I know it's a simple comedic trick, but it cracks me up every time. What even semi-functional individual slams into a door? How do they not notice the handle? Why would they assume the door has just been left open for them? I mean seriously, who does that?

Oh wait...damn.

I had a meeting tonight for the student athletic training organization I'm president of over at Julie's house, our advisor and program director. As I came up the walk, I could hear everyone already inside chatting amongst themselves, and when I neared the door I focused in on Julie's little hotdog of a canine, Skipper. "They really shouldn't have left the door open, this guy looks like the type that might make a break for it," I thought to myself as I reached my arms down to his level and greeted him. I was just about to scoop him up when...crack! I hit the screen door (yes screen and not glass...screen as in black mesh, not clear glass) with a force that knocked me back about 3 feet. Laughter exploded from my fellow SATO officers and I tried to laugh it off and enter the house, when I realized the door wouldn't open. "Unlock the door," I laughed, but it was not locked. Apparently I hit the door even harder than I thought and broke it. Not broke it as in knocked it off the tracks, but more like broke it as in "now we must remove the whole thing to let everyone out of the house after the meeting" broke it. Basically my worst fear was confirmed tonight, I am the biggest idiot I know. And with that hope of the existence of a more idiotic individual than myself, also goes my next invite to lasagna night.

On the plus side, it was totally a Bridget Jones moment, and had I mastered the accent by now and yelled, "Bugger, bugger, bugger!" after colliding with the door, my life would be complete.

2 comments:

Ryne said...

HAHAHAHAHA!!! Exactly the comic relief I needed from my neverending business law studying....

Aunt Lori said...

This fable reminds me of the time Johnny ran into the screen door at my house and the door, bent and off the track, was never again quite the same, although Johnny seemed as bent as ever. BUT you are not your brother and your faux pas leaves us questioning with trepidation many of the things of this world that we once took as gospel. . .

Your good fortune, however, is that you performed your amazing, both physical and intellectual, feat in front of mere friends who may let you one day forget, instead of your family who absolutely NEVER would.