Saturday, December 15, 2007

Part 3, Chapter 1

God has created me to do Him some definite service; He has committed some work to me which He has not committed to another. I have my mission--I may never know it in this life, but I shall be told it in the next.

I am a link in a chain, a bond of connection between persons. He has not created me for naught. I shall do good, I shall do His work. I shall be an angel of peace, a preacher of truth in my own place while not intending it--if I do but keep His Commandments.

Therefore, I will trust Him, whatever, wherever I am. I can never be thrown away. If I am in sickness, my sickness may serve Him; in perplexity, my perplexity may serve Him; if I am in sorrow, my sorrow may serve Him. He does nothing in vain. He knows what He is about. He may take away my friends, He may throw me among strangers. He may make me feel desolate, make my spirits sink, hide my future from me--still He knows what He is about.

~A Meditation by Cardinal Newman

The time for worrying is over, as it is unnecessary. Life will always go on, just as God intended it to. It is time for me to trust in the One who holds my future in His hands. And so begins what I like to call...Part 3, Chapter 1.

Wednesday, November 28, 2007

Minimal Progress

In an effort to join the adult masses, I have decided the first thing I need to do is get on an adult sleeping schedule. I have decided I will no longer sleep until ten o'clock because such a sleeping schedule will not coexist with a fancy adult job. Unfortunately, this goal has not yet been achieved. I keep accidentally oversleeping. I say accidentally in italics because some individuals (Kenric) question the validity of that statement. For the record, yes it is purely accidental that I hit the snooze button nine times before I get out of bed. How is that even close to being my fault? I also cannot help that I am in an altered state of mind when I wake up in the morning, and I forget that I am supposed to be adhering to a strict adult schedule. Also not my fault. In conclusion, my adult becoming progress is at a current minimal state.

Tuesday, November 27, 2007


Last night I was driving my younger cousins home from my grandma's house. My little cousin Nick, who's probably around 10 years old (Aunt Maggie?) asked me where I was going to school. I informed him that I had graduated, and being the smart little guy he is, he said, "But where are you going to grad school?" I told him that I wasn't going to grad school anymore because it wasn't for me. He then said to me, in a very matter of fact way, "Oh, so you're an adult now."

I couldn't help but laugh out loud. All I could say was, "Well...not exactly."

Which got me to thinking...maybe I am, or more appropriately put, maybe I should be.

Man, do I have a lot of work to do.

Saturday, November 17, 2007


4:15pm Beginning of work shift
Coworker A: You would not believe what just happened.
Coworker B: What?
Inner Bridget: What?
CA: I just asked the hostesses if they had a crack rock for me, and they just stared at me.
CB: Ugh. Stupid hostesses.
Inner Bridget: A what?!
CA: I need a pick me up before my shift, and they're all holding out on me.
CB: That is so like them.
Inner Bridget: Is she joking?
CA: How do they expect me to get through this shift.
Inner Bridget: Probably the same way I do.
CB: I don't know. It's going to be rough.

Coworker #1: Is that a picture of your man?!
Coworker #2: Yes.
C 1: Girl! Let me see him!
C 2: *handing over picture and looking disgusted* He's such a jerk.
Inner Bridget: Why are you dating him?
C1: Really?
C2: Yes, he lies to me all the time, and he's so mean to me. I think I'm going to dump him.
Inner Bridget: Probably best.
C1: Well, do you see yourself spending the rest of your life with him.
C2: Yes.
Inner Bridget: What?!
C1: Then sometimes you just have to take the good with the bad.
C2: Yeah, I think you're right.
Inner Bridget: What just happened here?

Coworker: I wasn't smoking before I met my boyfriend.
Bridget: No?
Coworker: No. But you know he's got a 3 ft glass bong and what was I supposed to do?
Inner Bridget: ...and she's not talking about cigarettes
Bridget: Oh.
Coworker: So I had to take advantage of it.
Bridget: Uh....OH! My order's up!
Inner Bridget: hmmmmmmm

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Planning for the Future

Hey kids, listen up while your good pal Bridget gives you a few lessons on life.

Lesson Number 1
When your mom gives you lunch money for school, pocket it. You do not need that crappy cafeteria food anyways. Hang on to it, I'll tell you why in a minute.

Lesson Number 2
When you are in the checkout line at Target, fixate your gaze on the register. Do not, I repeat, do not look at the shelves full of candy, or take a quick peak at the little cooler full of pop. You do not need either. Hang on to that money, I'll tell you why in a minute.

Lesson Number 3
So you like Slurpee's do you? You think 711 is a fun place to go? You like getting the biggest size possible and putting in every flavor available (except coke)? No. You don't need that either. Hang on to that money, I'll tell you why in a minute.

Lesson Number 4
Oh! You'd like to pick the most expensive university you can find to go away to (ehm Johnny)? BAD IDEA! A college degree is a college degree. Yes, you WILL mind if you are $80,000 in debt when you graduate. Instead, pick a cheap school with a decent reputation (this is possible) and you'll save some money. Hang on to that money, I'll tell you why in a minute.

Lesson Number 5
Do not take trips to exotic places. This is unnecessary. Fill up a kiddy pool in your backyard and knock yourself out. Hang on to that vacation money and instead, work when you can. I'll tell you why in a minute.

Lesson Number 6
Do not drive 86 mph through Wisconsin, especially if you have an IL license plate. You will be pulled over, they won't be nice, and you will get a ticket. This ticket will cost upwards of $200. Instead, hang on to that money, I'll tell you why in a minute.

Lesson Number 7
If you think having a nice over sized truck is a good idea, you're wrong (even if it is beautiful and spacious). It guzzles gas and probably will have a million things go wrong on it. Buy something small with good fuel efficiency. Hang on to that gas money, I'll tell you why in a minute.

Lesson Number 8
Music is nice. Did you know you can listen to it for free by turning on a radio? Stop buy Cd's, and music offline. Also, don't download it illegally, it could catch up with you and then you'll probably end up spending way more money. Instead, hang on to that money, I'll tell you why in a minute.

Lesson Number 9
While you're in college do something productive like invent a teleport. This way you will already be cashing in on your patent, and you'll be reducing all transportation costs.

Lesson Number 10
Do not go out to the movies. This will cost you a ridiculous amount of money. Not only will you pay $7.50 to get in, but you will inevitably fall victim to the concessions. They are very clever there and have exactly what you think you want/need. Instead, hang on to that money I'll tell you

One day you will graduate from college. While you were in college you built up a nice little thing called debt, probably in the form of student loans. If this did not happen to you, I don't want to hear about it. For the rest of us...all those loans that we never gave much thought to actually do need to be paid back. Oh and that little 6 month grace period goes by very quickly, so don't even bank on that business. While you are waiting to get a big kid job because apparently the four year degree that you earned and that nice high GPA that you worked so hard for don't mean anything unless you validate it by passing a certification exam (ok, this part probably only applies to a select few of us...athletic training majors!), you are going to need some other form of income. In fact, you are going to need a very fast form of income. Most of these inbetween jobs you can get don't actually pay enough to support you if you'd like to live on your own, make car payments, pay for health insurance, pay for car insurance, and make payments on your student loans. This creates an unpleasant situation.

You might decide to become a waitress. You might be horrible at it. This may be because you are a nerdy bookworm and should not be allowed to interact with tables full of customers ("guests"). You might spill drinks on people. You might forget to bring out an appetizer...or five. You might be forced to head to work everyday in a men's shirt and tie, with an apron wrapped around your waist. You might feel ridiculous shouting "I'm in the weeds" and so you might not get any extra help when you're in over your head. You might start to care a little bit less about "100 percent guest delight." This might get you into trouble quickly.

To avoid this awful pitful, and to ensure that when you graduate you can live comfortably until you find a good job...STOP WASTING YOUR MONEY! Oh, and make sure you pick a major that doesn't require you jumping through five extra hoops just to get a job.

P.S. Happy Anniversary Aimee and Tom. I'd much rather be going to your wedding again today, than going to work.

Friday, October 26, 2007

Chapstick, the Homewrecker

The first of the topics I must discuss is the very compelling issue brought forth by Cat.


What a curious little invention. Seemingly so innocent, and yet so destructive. I know all too well the pain which is caused by this little tube of balm. It has special powers that trick the human mind. Think about it. There you sit, perfectly fine, you and your lips. No problems or disputes between you. And happens. A woman just a few feet away begins to dig in her purse. You're nosey, so you watch. You become mesmerized. "WHAT IS SHE GOING TO PULL OUT?" you scream from inside your head. Then, slowly, but confidently she produces a small plastic tube, equal in length to your pinkie finger. In one swift movement she plucks off the cap and raises the skin protectant to her lips. Instinctively your own lips start to hurt. They feel dry and you lick them in a desperate attempt to quench their unyielding thirst. You begin to reel the contents of your own purse through your mind like a mental slide show...wallet, checkbook, clicky pen, chocolate, cell phone, Chihuahua named Fifi, and more chocolate. "Oh no! I have no chapstick," the tiny voice inside your head screeches at a decibel that makes your purse pooch duck for cover. Instantly your lips feel like the Sahara desert, and you stare longingly at the woman moisturizing her lips. Your lips begin to pulse with pain.

SNAP OUT OF IT. There's nothing wrong with you. You've been duped by the mind powers of the chapstick. This however, is not chapstick's worse offense. Chapstick is a homewrecker, and so is Cat for suggesting this topic. Because now I have to talk about it, and it will surely get me in trouble.

Setting: Minivan in route to Colorado.

I sit in the backseat staring absent mindedly out the window watching the trees roll by. My mind is numb from under stimulation when out of the corner of my eye I see my mother pull something out of her purse. Chapstick. The syndrome instantly begins and my lips start to hurt and feel chapped and dry. After generously (selfishly) applying the chapstick to her own lips, she goes to replace the tube back into her purse.

"Wait mom! Can I use that?" I ask earnestly.

She looks at me disgustedly, as if I wasn't the same individual that came rolling out of her some 16 or so years earlier. "No," she replies, and turns back around.

"Please, they are so dry," I moan.

"Be quiet Bridget."

"But mo..."

"I am not about to have your germs on my chapstick."

"I'm your daughter!"

"Yes I remember. I almost died giving birth to you, now be quiet."

"But they are chapped and hurt"

"Chapped?! Don't talk to me about chapped. My lips darn near chapped right off as I pushed you into this world, don't talk to me about chapped lips."

"So you understand what it's like then?"

"Do you want to walk to Colorado?"

As you can see, 6 years later, the hurt is still very fresh. Shaky fist chapstick.

Monday, October 22, 2007

Did You Miss Me?

So I'm ready to starting blogging again, but now that I have the time, I'm fresh out of ideas. You'd think I'd have a lot to say with everything that has happened in the last 5 months, but I'm coming up empty. I could talk about quitting grad school (taking a leave of absence) but really, that doesn't sound like much fun. I could talk about what a lunatic I have become lately, but I think Kenric should only have to live through those incidences once. I could talk about all of the crazy projects my mom keeps throwing at me (love you mom) while she tells me in the same breath I need to work on getting a job, but that will get me into trouble. Actually that whole last sentence has, "Bridget you're grounded," written all over it. Yes, I am 22 years old. I could talk about my plans for the future, but they change everyday so putting them in writing seems kind of pointless. I could talk about cake...mmm cake...but that doesn't seem very healthy. I could talk about how I started running again (by started I mean today I went out and jogged/crawled 2 miles), but then I'd have to admit just how out of shape I am. So as you can see, I've got nothing here.

What would you like to hear about?

It's Ugg boot season! Woohoo!

I missed you too.

Saturday, September 08, 2007


Some people are really good at being sick. What I mean to say is, some people handle it much more gracefully than others. In fact, they hardly let on that they are sick at all, and if you weren't around them long enough to take in all the coughing and nose blowing, you'd never even know.

I am not some people.

When I feel ill, all the world must know. When I get sick I'm never just, "not feeling well," I'm always, "dying." I am not the kind of person to lock myself away in my bedroom and reemerge when all is well. I must surround myself with reluctant individuals so I have ample victims to whine at. I moan and groan, and shift around restlessly, ensuring that everyone knows I am uncomfortable and displeased with my current state.

I am demanding.
Anna's voicemail: Hi you've reached Anna...blah, blah, blah...leave a message after the peep.
Me: Anna, this is Bridget. I hope the reason you're not answering your phone right now is that you're making me chicken noodle soup from scratch. I'm on my way over to your house right now.

I refuse anything that makes sense.
Me: I don't feel well.
Mom: Bridget, did you take anything?
Me: NO!
Mom: Well...
Me: Wha?
Mom: How old are you?

I am wholly unreasonable.
Location: Meijer Store, Soft Drink Aisle
Current state: feverish, coughing/hacking, red eyes (possibly even glowing), wandering through aisle clearly distressed
Meijer Shelf Stocker: Can I help you?
Me: *Angry glare* You can start by explaining why there is no Vernors on these shelves.
Stocker: Vernors?
Me: Vernors! The original ginger soda! A Michigan original since 1866!
Stocker: Oh! You need some ginger ale! Ok, well right here we have Canada Dry.
Me: *Eyes narrowing into an even angrier glare* Are you kidding me? I'm sick and quite possibly dying. I need a cure all, not some pansy Canadian ginger ale. Do you want me to be dead by morning?!
Stocker: I'm sure they taste the same.
Me: *Eyes widening into utter disbelief* No. It's not the same. Kenric always brings me Vernors when I'm sick!
Stocker: *Blank stare*
Me: This is an outrage, I'll shop elsewhere.

For those of you thinking, "Bridget, that doesn't sound like you. You don't like to talk to strangers." Well, you're right. Most of that conversation probably occurred in my head, but in my current diseased state I can no longer tell the difference between fiction and reality. If you'd like a more accurate version, it probably went more like this...

Meijer Shelf Stocker: Can I help you?
Me: No thanks. *Leaves store empty handed and buys Vernors elsewhere*

I am morbid.
Mom: What are you doing?
Me: Palpating my stomach.
Mom: Why?
Me: I'm making sure my appendix is not about to burst open and kill me.
Mom: Just go to bed.

I am dramatic.
Thermometer reading: 99.4 degrees F.
"Ahhh! I have a fever. I AM dying!"

I am slightly over the top.
Location: Meijer Store Checkout
Cashier scans...
1 Bottle DayQuil Cold & Flu
1 Bottle NyQuil Cough
1 Pack Cepacol Sore Throat Cherry Flavored Extra Strength Lozenges (18pack)
1 Pack Cepacol Sore Throat + Cough Mixed Berry Lozenges (18 pack) [is it bad that the back of the box has a limit on how many I can consume in a 24 hour period (12)?]
1 Bottle of Extra Strength Rapid Release Tylenol

Knowing that I am extremely unpleasant and whiny in this state, I have taken several measures to overcome my current illness. Last night I went to bed at 9:30pm. This is huge for me. Unfortunately all the coughing and hacking made for a very restless night, and I finally rolled out of bed 12 hours later feeling much worse than I had before. I went out and bought a pharmacy worth of drugs (see above), but they don't seem to be helping. I tell you all of this so that you may avoid all contact with me. My family has left the house for the day leaving me no one to whine at all day, and so the next person I speak with will get the brunt of a days worth of whining that I've been storing up.

You've been warned.

Monday, August 13, 2007

Keep Reading

I'm overtired and over dramatic...perfect time for blogging.

Yes Mom, I should be studying.

Yesterday I saw the movie Becoming Jane. I was a little weary to see it because Jane Austen is my favorite author and I doubted Anne Hathaway could do her justice. Not that I don't like Anne, but I just don't see her as Jane. The movie wasn't half bad. It portrayed my heroine much like I would. I've always been able to relate to Jane Austen. There's something so enticing about being able to write in your own happy endings when you feel so far from them yourself.

I have a strong sense that even if I could write my own ending, I'd mess it up. There's no way I could get it quite as good as what God has in mind. Normally I'm so opposed to flipping to the end of a book just to see how it ends. I mean if you read the end first, what's the point of experiencing the rest of it? But right now, I feel differently. Right now I'd just like to read the last page and see how it ends up. Maybe then I could calm down and relax. I could stop worrying about everything I can't control.

I mean of course it would be easier to trust someone if you knew they were going to come through for you, but I guess it wouldn't really be trust then would it?

So I guess I'll just keep reading.

I don't think this entry makes sense to anyone but me. I think I'll post it anyways. I'm glad we had this conversation.

Sunday, August 12, 2007


To answer everyone's question...

"Bridget! How's school going???"

I sawed through a corpse's skull with a hacksaw last week.

Anymore questions?

Didn't think so.


Saturday, June 30, 2007

Holy Cats

Hello. Yes, I'm still alive...barely. I started MWU's Physician Assistant graduate program 3 weeks ago, hence no blog entries in a month.

I am in over my head.

I could just whine about it, but instead I'll show you an example of one of my school days, and you can imagine me whining about it.

6:00am Alarm goes off.

6:50am Get in truck

7:00am Run into construction

7:15am Run into some more construction

7:25am Stop and wait for reaaaallly long train to pass

7:40am Sit in traffic that does not move for no reason at all

8:05am Arrive at Midwestern University

8:10am Sit through a 2 hour Biopsychosocial Issues lecture

10:10am Sit through a 2 hours Clinical Medicine lecture

12:00pm Lunch (aka reviewing anatomy notes)

1:10pm Anatomy Lecture

2:10pm Anatomy Lab with cadavers (3 hrs)

5:00pm Library study time for two hours to avoid rush hour traffic

7:00pm Head home

8:00pm Arrive at home, tired, crabby and hungry.

9:00pm Start studying

12:00am Go to bed

So this is a typical day. The classes vary between those mentioned above and then two different biochems and a professional seminar. Sometimes I get to go home earlier than that, sometimes I get to arrive a little later. Regardless, I'm pretty sure they're trying to kill me. However, I have made it through 3 weeks already, and that means there's only 8 more to go until I get one week off. After that week off I get to start a whole new set of classes, with the added bonus of having eight classes instead of the six I can barely handle now.

So to answer all of your questions along the lines of, "How's grad school going?!"...

"Please send chocolate and pray for me."

I miss you all. I miss my life. When I get time to write a new blog entry (probably in 2 years) I'll try to make it more uplifting.

Also, I still have not seen or heard one ice cream truck. It is now almost July. Is anyone else concerned?

Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Jamba Juice

12:30pm: Darn it, I'm hungry. Ooooo. This granola bar looks swell. This should hold me over until dinner.
*Granola Bar consumed*
12:31pm: That was really good. So satisfying.
12: 39pm: Holy Cats! I'm starving. Stupid granola bar!
12:41pm: I should eat something. Yes KFC, let's eat KFC.
12:42pm: No! I feel like that is counter productive to the run we did this morning. Oh come on! We'll get that twister thing. There's lettuce in that, how can it not be good for you?
12:43pm: It costs money! We have no income. Income? Psh. Take some money from Johnny. No! That's not nice.
12:44pm: I need something free. I should just make a sandwich. Noooooooo! Such effort! Don't do it! How is that going to be satisfying?! Shhhhh Inner Bridget, I have no money. A sandwich will be just fine. Doubt it.
12: 45pm: WAIT! I'VE GOT IT! Jamba Juice! Oh my gosh! I'm right! I have a coupon for a free smoothie!
12:47pm: *Jump into truck, drive to Jamba Juice.*
12:55pm: *Arrive at Jamba Juice. Open purse to dig out coupon.*
12:56pm: *Dig through purse for 5th time...still no coupon.*
12:57pm: Where is my coupon! What the heck?! It was just in here a few days ago. When was the last time you saw it? When we pulled it out to use it with Ryne but Jamba Juice was closed...wait a minute. Ryne stole it! He stole our coupon! Ryne wouldn't steal it, don't be silly. Oh yes he would! Greedy! He took it alright! He's a dead man!
12:58pm: *Contemplating*
12:59pm: Do you really think he took it? Well it didn't get up and walk out of here now did it? He is a dead man! Hell hath no fury like a woman robbed of her free smoothie!
1:00pm: What now? What do you mean what now? Get in there! Go buy us a smoothie, I'm starving! But now I have to pay for it. Come on, I know you're hungry. Fine! But just this once.
1:05pm: *Exit Jamba Juice, smoothie in hand.*
1:15pm: *Smoothie consumed to completion.*
1:19pm: I'm starving!

11:30pm: *Searching jean pockets*
11:31pm: What's this? My Jamba Juice coupon! Hurrah! Fantastic! I can't believe you blamed Ryne.

Sunday, May 27, 2007

Spring Shopping

Isn't shopping for clothes fun? I love walking into a place and seeing nothing but size 0-4 crowding every rack. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside to have to scrounge about to the very back of each rack praying that they have at least one pair of shorts in a double digit size. Usually they don't bother to put these ones out. Apparently women that size don't need clothes. They can just wear togas or ponchos. Don't worry, if that's not your style usually there's a for sale rack hidden somewhere in the store. This is most likely located in a hole in the wall behind the sea of flip flops, accessed by spinning the green and white striped ones counterclockwise three times. That is where you will find clothes for the "other women."

And aren't the new spring fashions just darling? I'm sure every girl has enough self confidence and lacks enough modesty and morals to skip around in shorts that just barely cover her rear end. Thank goodness we were all born with twig like legs to pull these off. I also really enjoy the cute new tops that are out right now. I mean sure, I didn't realize they were shirts at first, I mistook one or two for a bandanna, and that other thing for a skirt, but after I bumped into the manikins, it all started making sense. Those dresses are awesome too. I hear see-through is the new black anyways right?

I guess I just have a few questions...
1) Do you have anything that will at least cover up my undergarments?
2) If I wanted to do something besides stand up straight and look pretty, do you have anything that wouldn't fall off my body while functioning on a normal human being level?
3) Since you've woven your dresses into pretty little numbers with gaping holes, do you have another dress I could put on underneath it?
4) If I were to wear the shirt that looks like a mini skirt, can I simultaneously wear a few of the shirts that look like bandannas, strategically fashioned to cover the rest of my torso?
5) The white see-through pants are really lost on me, can you explain those?
6) Let's say, just as a hypothetical question, that I wanted to cover up more than 10% of my you have a swimsuit for that?
7) Ultra low rise jeans? For real? What? Why?
8) How do you sit in those? And still feel comfortable?
9) I'm all for recycling, but since when did people start turning in their hammocks so that they could be made into articles of clothing?
10) If I wear a large, what are women bigger than me supposed to wear? Seriously.

Tuesday, May 22, 2007


Dear Ice Cream Truck Driver Man-

Perhaps you didn't get the memo. It's warm outside. Come back. Today the temperature is hovering around 85 degrees, and you are no where to be found. I know it's only May, but I REALLY need some ice cream. Of course I could go to the store, but then I'd miss out on that fine music that you so eloquently blare from your speakers. I really want (NEED) a Choco Taco. Don't even try to lie to me and tell me you've been out and about, and that I just haven't heard you. I have a special sense for these things. I can hear you come from miles off...with headphones the middle of a hail storm...over my sister practicing her trumpet. Maybe you should just give me your cell phone number, or your pager. That way we won't have these conflicts.
I miss you a lot,

Dear Johnny,
I can't believe you ate the last Drumstick! You do realize that the Ice Cream Truck Driver Man is not yet making his rounds?! You've completely put my mood/life in jeopardy. Go buy me one of those Chocolate Eclair Bars.
~Your Favorite Sister

Dear Neighbor Girl~
I noticed that you were out on your deck tanning when I awoke at 11am. It concerns me that you are still out tanning now, and it's after 3pm. I let it go the first 5 days in a row I witnessed this all day event, but now I feel I must really say something. First of all, you probably just graduated college as I did, seeing as we graduated high school at the same time, and I assume you should be doing something with your life, like finding a job. Tanning for six hours a day might interfere with this search. Secondly, one's skin should not resemble a Coach Purse. That's not hot. You were officially tan about two weeks ago. You can stop now. This is just over kill. Lastly, I'm sorry about the singing. I forget that you spend your entire day sunbathing on your deck and that you can hear me singing from my kitchen while I do the dishes. That's my bad.
SPF 45 is nice.

Wednesday, May 09, 2007

Where Have I Been?

Oh my gosh, where have I been? Why have I not been blogging? Seriously, not one post in the whole month of April, that's ridiculous!

It's not my fault, really it isn't. You can blame the following:

1) 3 months of procrastination which led to one intense month of April (how is that my fault?!)
2) Kenric (yeah that's right, I said it)
3) Graduating/Saying Goodbye (teh sad)
4) Nice weather

Now that I've completely pawned off all the blame, let's get down to business. So I've graduated from Northern Michigan University with a Bachelors of Science in Athletic Training. Yay. Time to relax...not. I start grad school in June at Midwestern University. I'll be there for two years studying to be a Physician Assistant. Blah blah blah...enough of this.

New topic. So saying goodbye to people was a lot harder than I imagined it would be. The result was an over emotional Bridget who cried at the drop of a hat and rocked back and forth till the early hours of the morning. I'm not so good with the whole change thing. I met a lot of amazing people over the past four years and I wish I could take them all with me wherever I go. This is not the case. I can, however, take with me the lessons I learned from them all. A large part of learning is sharing your knowledge with the next person, so here I go...

1) No situation is ever hopeless.
2) Trusting people is the only way you'll ever get anywhere in life.
3) The most courageous person you'll ever meet may just be a triple jumper who only stands 5 feet 3 inches tall (correction 5'1").
4) The world doesn't end when someone else sees you cry.
5) Good friends are hard to find, but hard and impossible have never been the same thing.
6) You're never too old for Lego's and coloring books...or sand toys.
7) Sometimes you just need to hug it out.
8) No one ever has it all figured out.
9) When you dream, dream big.
10) In life you're going to say things you wish you hadn't, but remember God knew you were going to say them hundreds of years before they ever rolled off your tongue. Just go with it.
11) The wisest people you'll ever meet are usually younger than you. Probably because they've been learning from your mistakes.
12) You can search all you want for the remote, but there are some things in life that you just can't rewind.
13) Being sure of your future is impossible, being sure of yourself is imperative. Love yourself.
14) The people you love the most are the people who can hurt you the most. Love them anyways. Love to the point of sacrifice.
15) Sometimes you receive gifts from God that you don't think you deserve. He doesn't accept returns, just say thanks.
16) Life is not easy. If it's easy, then we're probably not living it right. We all have crosses to bear, but there is glory in the cross.
17) If you can't see yourself through God's eyes, find someone who can. Ask them what they see...and believe them.
18) The times in your life where you feel most alone are the times when God is closest, reach out and latch on.
19) The only situations that are impossible to get through are the ones we try to get through alone.
20) Every person deserves a chance...or 7 times 77 chances.
21) Never be afraid to try new things...even if you do end up spitting them out later.
22) Getting lost is an adventure worth taking every now and again.
23) Time is never wasted, when it's spent with people you care about.
24) It's not about the pizza and the treats. It's never been about that. It's about the people.
25) Surround yourself with people who will never give up on you.
26) A ledger pad is useless without the paper that fills it and the individuals who write in their lasting impact.
27) When someone comes to you for help, it's not a mistake.
28) The only things we need to strive for in life are faith, hope, and love. The end.
29) Don't ever write yourself off, you never know when a blond-haired, blue-eyed boy is going to walk into your life and prove you wrong.
30) If you get the choice to sit it out or dance, I hope you dance.

As I drove out of Marquette this past Sunday I remember looking out my rear view mirror thinking, "objects in mirror are closer than they appear." I don't think 400 miles will ever change that. I love you guys!

Saturday, March 31, 2007

I couldn't have said it any better

This, ladies and gentlemen, is why my cousin Kate really is cooler than me. I'm sitting here posting about chocolate and Ugg boots, while she perfectly recalls some of the best times of our lives. Lake Wisconsin Vacations.

Fantastic post Kate.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007


An extra special glimpse into the mind of women...or at least this woman.

To say that a woman's mood can be highly relient upon chocolate and/or desserts and/or Mike and Ike's (any candy of similar substance) is NOT, I repeat, NOT a stereotype. It is a fact.

That is all.

Thursday, March 08, 2007

Uh oh...

Cleaning must commence...2 days ago!

Kenric is coming to visit the STC and much cleaning needs to occur in order for me not to get shot by my mother (love you mom!). In a house of 6 people, 4 dogs (yes I'm including Mr. Stan...he's here all the time anyways), 3 cats, a guinea pig, and a partridge in a pear tree, cleaning is no small task. It's actually very overwhelming and so instead of actually cleaning I keep doing things slightly related to the task...

1) Make a list of what needs to be cleaned
2) Take an inventory of cleaning supplies
3) Blog about needing to clean
4) Stare off into space thinking about cleaning

In other related news...
Dear family members,
Feel free to stop by at any time this weekend. You would not believe the ambush I received upon entering his house last weekend. Retaliation is only fair. Come in hoards.

Monday, February 26, 2007

Group Projects Part 2

It's that time of year again! Group project time! Do we remember how much I love Group Projects? Love them. I love them with a passion likened only to the wonderful sensation of sandpaper rubbing against my skin. I'm glad to see that no matter what class I'm in, nothing changes. It's good to have consistency. It's something I can depend on. I can depend that if there are incompetent, unmotivated people in my class I will most definitely be grouped up with them to complete a lengthy project. Fantastic. My current group might just top the charts.

Email sent out...
Hey guys-
We need to do that 470 project. For those of you who can make it, we're going to meet at the library at 9pm. We'll meet up at the circulation desk and go from there.

That's pretty clear right? Nothing too confusing? I enter the library at 8:55pm through the basement which is actually just a lounge area with a food court/Starbucks where people can socialize and eat. As I'm cutting through this area to head upstairs to the actual library part and the circulation desk I see two members of my group sitting at a table eating nachos. I figured they were just finishing up dinner before our meeting so I head over to say hello, and insanity ensues...

Me: "Hi guys."
Idiot #1: "Oh good, you're here!"
Me: "Uh...yeah."
Idiot #2: "We didn't know what the circum...whatever was."
Idiot #1: "Yeah, so we decided to just meet down here and hope you found us."
Me: "The circulation desk?"
Idiot #2: "Yeah! That's it!"
Me: Are you kidding me?! "Well, that's the desk you check your books out at."
Idiot #1 (3rd year in least): "I've never done that."
Me: Remain calm. Don't hit him. Breathe. Why would I even look for you down here, this isn't even the actual library?! "Well this table isn't going to work."
Idiots: "Wha...?"
Me: Smaller words, talk slower. ""
Idiot #1: Well I didn't see anything else.
Me: *Looks across the room and sees 5 different tables that would work* SERIOUSLY? "Well let me take a look and see what I can find." IDIOTS! *Returns five seconds later* "Ok, my backpack is on that one over there, go ahead and head over. I'm going to go get the others...the one's who actually know what a circulation desk is."
Idiots: *While staring directly at the table with my backpack...the only open table with a giant backpack sitting on it* "Which one?"
Me: Just walk away. No, murdering someone with a plastic knife is not a good idea.


The Official Site of The Chicago Cubs: Homepage


Friday, February 23, 2007

Sleep or lack there of

I woke up at 4am this morning. It is now 2am the next morning. I haven't even taken a nap. That's 22 hrs of being awake folks. 22 hrs of being awake, and not one thing to blog about. Hmmm. I should go to bed.

Should I mention the all nighter I pulled the night before?

It's almost the weekend!

Tuesday, February 20, 2007

Uggs = Pandemic

Ok so I know I keep mentioning Ugg boots, but I can't help it. People bring this stuff to me. I would be able to ignore the epidemic or perhaps by now it's more of a pandemic, but no. It's like I've got Uggs spies. I get phone calls, emails, and even pictures. And darn it...I love it. I love hearing your Ugg boot sightings. Uggs are being spotted across the country. I knew they ran ramped up here in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan, but I had no idea they had overtaken my homeland of Illinois and now even Colorado. Here are two of the most recent updates I have received:
1) Uggs on Ice (Champaign/Urbana, IL)
Kate phoned me two weeks ago to report a most amusing scenario. As she strolled the icy campus of U of I, she found herself walking behind what I can only define as an Ugg Hoard.
[Ugg Hoard (noun): A group of two or more individuals wearing Ugg boots, who only allow other Ugg boot wearing individuals to be walking within 10 feet of them. These individuals have not fully embraced their Uggs enough to be comfortable wearing them all on their own, so they recruit other Ugg boot wearing individuals to surround them. Safety in numbers.]
For some reason they were sliding all over the place in their Uggs...I can't imagine why that would be. In frustration one of the girls finally exclaimed, "STUPID UGGS! This is what they were supposed to be made for!" Really? Is that the purpose of Uggs? Ice walking? I guess it make sense considering their excellent treads. And all of this time I thought it was just because they looked amazing on people. Especially when someone tucks khakis into them. That's hot.
2) Uggs Crossing Gender Lines (Denver, CO)
My sister and and her husband Tom are currently in Colorado. It seems the entire population has embraced Ugg boots, MEN and women alike. And why not? We already know they are excellent for icy conditions, why not apply that ingenious engineering to a mountainous terrain?

And I knew it was only a matter of time before men fell victim to this fashion craze. Everything about the Ugg screams masculinity. Deep down inside I think men the world over have just been waiting for the perfect shoe they could tuck their jeans into. The cowboy boot certainly doesn't allow for such a thing, nor does the steel toe boot or sneaker. Finally with Uggs those pesky jeans can be properly confined so scorpions and other such hazardous creatures can't crawl up one's pant leg.

Ugg boots appear to be the solution to so many of life's problems. Maybe I should jump on the band wagon...


Saturday, January 27, 2007

Pardon me, but you look ridiculous

I think I've made it clear that I take Ugg boot wearing as a serious offense. Many of my friends, however, have these retched shoes, and I'm able to overlook it.

Today my older sister informed me of a situation I cannot overlook.

While visiting an indoor water park Aimee came across a most peculiar sight. An 18 year old female on the pool deck fashioning a teeny tiny bikini. Of course this is not abnormal in this day and age, but wait, I'm not finished. A top of this bikini she wore a winter jacket (unzipped), a short jacket with fur lining the hood. To add insanity to madness, this bright young lady was also sporting Ugg boots. Approximate temperature on pool deck: 70 degrees.

Which leads to the all important question: What thought process leads to such a display?

*In Hotel room preparing to go downstairs to the pool*
Hmmm. What to wear? A tiny string bikini! Yes that's it! It is completely useless and will probably fall apart should I actually end up in the water, but darn it, I'll look good.
*Glances out window*
Oh my gosh! Is it snowing? In January? Really? Hmmm. Better take a coat. I'll just take this short one here and not zip it up so the world can still see my amazing suit. I'd like to parade around the pool deck, but it's always so wet. I wouldn't want to dampen my toes. Shoes. Yes shoes would be perfect.
*Opens closet*
Flip, those are summer shoes, it's January.
Tennis, I'm not trying to get a work out in here.
Uggs...oh my gosh! Yes that's perfect. I mean, it is snowing out after all!

It is fortunate that I was not present for this spectacle. Had I come across this unique individual on the pool deck I probably wouldn't have been able to avoid pulling her aside and saying, "Pardon me, but you look ridiculous."

Friday, January 19, 2007

Self Help

Dear Self,
I know that you're tired and sleep deprived. I realize that you just made the 7 1/2 hour trip between Illinois and Marquette 3 times in the last five days, and that you endured a 5 hour interview process in which you actually had to converse with strangers, but you need to find a different form of energy. It is ill advised to completely switch your diet over to caffeinated pop, cappuccinos, and Mike and Ikes just to remain awake during the day. Believe it or not, there is very little nutritional value associated with these recent staples in your life. If you're wondering why your stomach has been so upset lately and why you've been walking around shaking like a crack fiend, I'm going to go out on a limb and say the intense sugar intake might have something to do with it. I am certainly not trying to dispute the fact that the combination of Mountain Dew and Mike and Ikes is an excellent way to stay awake when driving late at night, but I am saying that somewhere a line needs to be drawn. I'm worried about you kid. Take a break. Sleep in tomorrow. Eat something with substance (like pizza). In the future if you're getting tired while driving, roll down the window and stick your head out. Yes I realize it's below freezing and that you drive at an alarming speed, but at least your stomach will be happy.

As long as we're hammering out your issues here, let me address this other thing that has been bothering me. I don't like your relationship with Mike and Ike. I think it's borderline obsessive. I know you don't get to enjoy them very often, but seriously. I'm concerned with the crazy gleam you get in your eye everytime you remember that you still have some left over from your recent trip. Don't think I didn't notice the tears welling up in your eyes earlier today when you bit into that little red one after you had left the box out to freeze in your truck all night. You nearly broke your tooth on that thing, and yet you sucked on it until it was in a chewable state. And yes, I did see how you then took a handful out and held on tight to them for the next five minutes, thawing them in your fist. You may not have minded the sticky residue, but I did. This is unhealthy. Let them go. Find real friends...Sour Patch Kids don't count.

Thursday, January 11, 2007


DISCLAIMER: The following post was forced upon me by the very two people in which the content focuses on. I attempted to warn them that a blog focused on the eradication of idiots is not something you want to be the headliner on. I was ignored. I was begged. “Please blog about us Bridget! It will be funny,” they said, again and again. So I finally broke down. Everything that will be said and any pictures that might be displayed are done so with the expressed consent and encouragement from the so called victims. That is all.

To start us off, let me paint a picture.

10am. New Years day. Bridget passed out in bed with the book she fell asleep while reading lying open next to her. Bridget began her reading after all her guests left the house and she went well into early hours of the morning reading. Bridget’s foreseen awakening time: 12pm.

Beep. Beep. (Text Message Alert)

Exhausted Bridget rolls over to look at clock. 9:58am. Who the hell?
“One new message from: Megan. ‘Colonial for breakfast?’”
No money, must sleep. Phone flips shut without replying (mistake). Bridget returns to sleep.


Exhausted Bridget rolls over to look at clock. 10:01am. Ugh Laura!
Groggy Bridget flips open cell phone to see “Laura” type across screen.
Phone flips shut. Bridget returns to sleep.

Beep. Beep.

Exhausted Bridget rolls over to look at clock. 10:02am. I hate you both!
“One new message from: Laura. ‘Wake up we are hungry. Let’s get food.”
No money, must sleep. Phone flips shut without replying. Bridget returns to sleep.

**Time out. You’re probably thinking, “Idiot! Why didn’t you just shut off your phone?” Answer: I was expecting an important phone call. Or perhaps you are thinking, “Why didn’t you just answer the phone and tell them no?” Answer: Answering the phone will lead to only one thing: giving up, waking up, and meeting them for the breakfast that I can’t afford. Megan and Laura do not take no for an answer. In fact, had I answered the phone, I have a feeling that they would continue to call knowing I was semi awake and not cease in their attempts at communication until I agreed to go. Time in**


Exhausted Bridget rolls over to look at clock. 10:06am. Ugh Megan!
Groggy Bridget flips open cell phone to see “Megan” typed across screen.
Phone flips shut. Bridget returns to sleep.


Exhausted Bridget rolls over to look at clock. 10:07am. Noooo Laura!
Groggy Bridget flips open cell phone to see “Laura” typed across screen.
Phone flips shut. Bridget returns to sleep.

Beep. Beep.

Exhausted and irritated Bridget rolls over to look at clock. 10:11am. Reoccurring Nightmare.
“One new message from: Laura. ‘Colonial!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!’
Noooooooooooo! Phone flips shut without replying. Bridget returns to sleep.

Who are these people?

This is Megan and Laura and they believe that if they each alternate calling me in rapid fire then the chance of their call being answered will increase. This is a false notion. They are my close friends from home believe it or not, and I affectionately refer to them as The Jokers. It is useless to refer to them as two separate individuals because that’s just simply not how they function. Megan and Laura have merged into one solid unit of jokerness. For those of you not familiar with this whole concept of being a joker, I will use Megan and Laura to help educate you. Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you the top 25 ways you know that you are a joker.

You know you’re a joker when…
25)…a canister of Play-Doh brings on fits of laughter.
24)…you believe you are a princess and are therefore entitled to everything you want when you want it.

23)…you can go out to eat four times in one day and still want to go home and eat fudge
22)…you are upset with your friends and decide the best way to resolve the matter is to leave them the following message: We are in a fight. Bye.
21)…you are 21 years old and have no control over your bladder
20)…you are blind without your glasses, but insist that you don’t need them, which nearly causes you to run your bike into the back of a parked car.

19)…seeing someone in a giant Winnie the Pooh costume causes you to turn bright red with excitement and screech “WINNIE THE POOH!”

18)…you wear Ugg boots.
17)…you have to call your best friend up at least once a week to remind her that you are indeed best friends.
16)…you place an open can of beer in your brand new purse because you’re “saving it for later!”
15)…you actually enjoy listening to Ashlee Simpson.
14)…you were surprised and disappointed to find that Lance Bass is gay.

13)…you lack the common sense to know that police officers wouldn’t really call you on your cell phone to say that they know you’re inside someone’s house partying and that they are waiting outside to arrest you.
12)…all of your hair color decisions are based upon the hair color of your joker best friend.
11)…the joke, “Aren’t you two a cute couple,” will never get old to you.
10)…every time you eat a meal you eat to the point where you are so full that eating becomes painful and causes you to make noises such as, “Ugh! Ahhh! Ow! Oh!” as well as make loud long sighs, and then you continue to eat more food.
9)…your accomplishments in your sorority/fraternity are the crowning achievements in your life.
8)…you are deaf to a degree which ensures that everything said during a conversation will have to be repeated for your sake.
7)…you are proud of the POS stereo that occupies your entire trunk and has been broken for several years. You somehow assume that turning it up will drown out the strange noises it emits, therefore causing your backseat passengers to become as deaf as you are.
6)…you self appoint yourself as the minion of your best friend
5)…you attempt to court your best friend’s older brother when drunk.

4)…you show your two other friends how much you value their friendship by inviting them over for a costume party so you can point and laugh at them as they walk in dressed as an oompa loompa and scarecrow, taking pleasure in the horrified look on their face when greeted by your costumeless entourage.
3)…instead of exchanging Christmas presents like normal people you tell your best friend that you’ve developed a new game in which she takes you shopping, you tell her to try to guess what you want (giving her extremely helpful hints) and then when she finally comes to the right decision you send her to the checkout to buy it for you.
2)…you go to Disneyworld and spend as much time as possible in the dingy hotel room which you hate, and that you’ve spent the last month describing as disgusting and low class, making your other two friends (who, unlike you, had to pay for the trip with their own money) feel guilty about not being able to afford something classy enough to please you. Also, while wasting away your time and parent’s money in said hotel room, you decide it would be fun to make the room appear as though a tampon machine exploded in the middle of the room conveniently sending tampons sailing all over the belongings of the only male on the trip.
1)…you actually requested to be the subject of one of Bridget’s blog posts.